Congruence and Self Sabatoge

Self-sabotage is a term used when someone is blocking themselves from achieving their ultimate goal. Does the definition of this term ring true for you? Or have you never considered that the obstacle in your path could be...you?

In The One Minute Millionaire, authors Hansen and Allen state that in order for success to be achieved one must establish congruence. Congruence is when things come into alignment, but not just arbitrary things, three very specific things. First, your desire...you have to want it. Second, your belief...you have to believe (have faith) that you can get it. Lastly, self-acceptance... you have to know and feel that you deserve to have it.

They sound simple, and it's easy to understand the reasoning behind them, but this is why so much self-sabotage occurs. One thinks that they're in alignment, while suppressing a tiny niggling fear or question of doubt. Just one such doubt or a wishy-washy thought on one of any of the three key areas is enough to de-rail your success.

So how does one overcome the doubts and defeat self-sabotage?

When Desire is Your Nemesis

Explore if you've really bought-in to your goal. Is it your goal or someone else's? Will it make you happy, or are you trying to fulfill an obligation, taking an easy way out, or just not feeling 100% about it? A classic example of this is when a son or daughter follows a career path to please a parent, even though they'd prefer to do something different. Make sure your goal is truly your heart's desire.

Do you really believe that?

Wanting a goal and believing that you can actually achieve the goal are as different as night and day. Many people want success, but how many really believe that they can become the next Donald Trump or Bill Gates? It's not lack of desire, but lack of belief.

Perhaps they are not sure how to proceed with the goal, or are unable to see how to afford the education to get started, or think they don't know the right people to contact. Whichever the case, these scenarios all work to weaken the belief system. Work on confidence building and add tools to your arsenal to combat limiting beliefs. If you approach your goal from what you DO have instead of what you think you don't have a positive shift will occur.

But am I Really Worthy?

Do you ask yourself if you're worthy to succeed? Many people compare themselves to the previous generation. "My parents had a very small home and only one car. My spouse and I have a 3,000 sq. ft. home, two cars, 1 or 2 incomes, and a boat, so we should be happy." Why? Should you be happy with less than you could achieve simply because it is more than others have? Only you can answer that question for yourself. Perhaps there is an underlying belief that wealth is the equivalent to greed? If you don't believe that you deserve to have success and everything that comes with it, success will remain elusive.

Congruence

Congruence is the key to reaching all of your goals successfully, whether they are goals of career, personal growth, or love. Triumph stems from your inner perceptions. Getting to know yourself honestly and wholly can unlock the doors to the happiness and success that until now, you've only dreamed about.

Eva Gregory, master coach, speaker and author of The Feel Good Guide To Prosperity has instructed thousands on the Laws of Attraction in person, on the radio and in dozens of teleconference training seminars and programs. She is the author of several books and e-books and has co-developed several telephone-based and internet-based training courses on the Laws of Attraction. Her most popular program to date is her Leading Edge Living One Year Success Program. Eva is regularly featured on radio and in the media and is a recognized authority on the Laws of Attraction. To learn more about her products and services, visit Leading Edge Coaching.

NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the “about the author” info at the end), and you send a copy of your reprint to eva@coacheva.com.

Do Everything-On Purpose!

Talk seems to be plentiful about "getting real" and "keeping it real" these says. But what exactly does that mean? One of the definitions of the word real is "being or occurring in fact or actuality; not imaginary or ideal." So basically, the talk is about dealing with what actually exists and not putting a happy spin on things. While it is definitely a good idea to know what is going on around you, being real is not the complete solution. Striving for your ideal, your passion, and your purpose -- is. Comprehension of the present situation helps lay the foundation for the ideas that follow, but your present is just that. Dreams are imaginary until you've put action and purpose to them to make them become realities. A goal is nothing more than that until it has been achieved.

How many instances can you recall of people who made incredible contributions to society based upon their acknowledgement of their reality, and their fierce dedication to the pursuit of their passion and desire to change said reality? They weren't afraid to stray from conventions and follow their own course. Think of something on a smaller scale, like Sadie Hawkins Day. Granted this day was created in the comic strips, but it was such a novel idea that it caught on in real life more than half a century ago. It was a huge thing for a female to ask a male out on a date. The creation of such a day alleviated the stigma and made it perfectly fine for a girl to ask a boy out. Think of the possible ripple-effects of such an esteem-building event. Women feeling free enough to take more of an active role. Think of how many lives have been shaped by something that was not real, but an idea conjured up by a writer. On a larger scale, look at the United States. This country was founded by people willing to break free of the norm, willing to embrace their passion and create a new reality. Our forefathers were definitely not lacking in purpose.

Your dreams may not have as widespread an impact, but they are just as important. Aren't you worth having a life full of purpose and rich with passion? No one should be stuck in reality, unable to allow yourself to each beyond your present towards a future full of passion and purpose. Take a lesson from someone you admire. Very few people reach their desired goal without first dreaming of how to get there. Even if your dream seems farfetched, never be afraid to step outside of the box. Real need not be a path on the straight and narrow, but a journey to destinations only you can chart.

Take some time in the coming month to review where you've traveled and determine if or how it differs from where you want to be. Remember it all starts with you. What are your dreams and goals? Explore them, learn them, list them, and make them real too. You can achieve reality, but only if you're real and honest enough with yourself to determine what it is you really feel passionate about. Just have fun with it and remember to keep it purposeful.

Eva Gregory, master coach, speaker and author of The Feel Good Guide To Prosperity has instructed thousands on the Laws of Attraction in person, on the radio and in dozens of teleconference training seminars and programs. She is the author of several books and e-books and has co-developed several telephone-based and internet-based training courses on the Laws of Attraction. Her most popular program to date is her Leading Edge Living One Year Success Program. Eva is regularly featured on radio and in the media and is a recognized authority on the Laws of Attraction. To learn more about her products and services, visit Leading Edge Coaching.

NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the “about the author” info at the end), and you send a copy of your reprint to eva@coacheva.com.

I Wanna Hold Your Hand

Do you have someone that you look up to? Is this someone that you would like to emulate? Someone that you feel has achieved the type of success that you would one day like to achieve? What if that person wanted to take you by the hand and show you the ropes, the steps that he/she took to get where they are? Well, if they did, you'd be mentored. Mentoring is the key to big-time success. The way that shortcuts are learned about, potential mistakes are avoided, and many contacts are made.

How does one find a mentor? The answer is ...typically through research. You've identified a new career, business, or idea that you would like to break into, but are clueless about how to make it happen. Through research you can identify others who have journeyed on the same or nearly same path, contact them and determine how best to approach them. Many of our famous scientists and theorists studied under each other before they came into their own. If one takes the time to find their most suitable mentor, the situation could be a learning experience for all involved. But it could just happen too. Often people find that when they need someone to answer questions, bounce ideas off of, or need some guidance, that person just shows up. Talk about fate and the laws of attraction.

How will this help in the long run? Mentoring is the fastest way to come up to speed to learn all of the tools and tricks of whatever trade you are considering. Mentoring will dramatically reduce your learning curve. You will be able to glean many years worth of experience in a matter of just a few hours. A mentor will help you learn to think like him or her, trust yourself, and empowers you to find answers on your own. In fact the benefit of being mentored is truly invaluable. But just don't think that the person being mentored is the only beneficiary. Just because they are the novice to the field does not mean that they have nothing to offer. They can offer fresh ideas, a more updated can-do attitude, and are not jaded to possibilities. There is a great deal of potential for a huge win-win.

How long will this take? Wouldn't it be wonderful if it was exceptionally quick? Well in reality it is. Imagine if a mentor has twenty or more years of experience. If it took you ten years to learn what he/she knows you'd achieve success in half the time, or one-quarter of the time if it took you five years to learn from your mentor. Mentorships typically take two to three years. Imagine being able to learn something that it took a person a lifetime of trail and error to learn in just over 1,000 days.

Why would someone want to mentor? I think that you can see that the more poignant question is ... why wouldn't someone want a mentor? Entrepreneurs do not have the corner on the mentor market. Take actors and athletes. What about when an established actor takes a new actor under his or her wing to help them begin their ascent up the ladder, or when a veteran athlete mentors a rookie.

So when you decide on your goal, get out your journal and start making a list of those mentors who could help propel you towards success. If they are out of your circle, don't let that stop you. Seek out information that may have been written by or about them that could further your goal. If you can contact them via mail, e-mail, or telephone, don't be shy ... nothing ventured, nothing gained. Who knows they may be so flattered that they may agree to mentor you, or may be able to at least start you on your way. No matter what, assemble your list, get those vibrations out into the universe, and who knows what, or who may show up unexpectedly.

Eva Gregory, master coach, speaker and author of The Feel Good Guide To Prosperity has instructed thousands on the Laws of Attraction in person, on the radio and in dozens of teleconference training seminars and programs. She is the author of several books and e-books and has co-developed several telephone-based and internet-based training courses on the Laws of Attraction. Her most popular program to date is her Leading Edge Living One Year Success Program. Eva is regularly featured on radio and in the media and is a recognized authority on the Laws of Attraction. To learn more about her products and services, visit Leading Edge Coaching.

NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the “about the author” info at the end), and you send a copy of your reprint to eva@coacheva.com.

Are You Positive Or Negative?

Magnetism is a wonderful thing. We often hear that someone "has a magnetic personality", or that they are "full of magnetism", even that opposites attract "like magnets". Why the fascination with magnetism? Perhaps because the term magnetism implies that the opportunity exists for something to be drawn to you easily and effortlessly. What if that thing is success, fame, or how about money?

Money is the thing that the majority of the population craves, but most people feel they don't have enough of. Why is that? Since we know how strong the powers of attraction are, and that like attracts like, the answer lies in the perception "∑but most people feel they don't have enough of."

For example, let's suppose that you are facing a bag of money. You REALLY want that bag of money. You are standing there thinking of all of the things you can't afford because you don't have the bag of money. You are focused on all the things you can't be, do, or have.

Money has a positive ionic charge, your face - has a positive charge (+) and the back of your head has a negative charge (-). The laws of the Universe say that you and the bag of money are going to continue to repel each other.

So let's imagine that you become frustrated and turn away from the bag of money. (Your negative charge is now facing the positive charge of the bag of money.) You would like to have it, and can think of all of the positive things you would like to do with it, and you are now vibrating positive thoughts. The Laws of Attraction say that you are now in a place where you can attract the bag of money. You have become a money magnet.

When you take a snapshot of your current scenario can you state with sincerity that you are magnetizing money? Have you let go of any limiting beliefs that you have about money? Like financial success is something that happens to others, or that you are undeserving? If money and financial success is your goal how can you become that all powerful magnet?

Allow it!

Allow yourself to let go of any negative thoughts and limiting beliefs that have blocked your success. Allow yourself to believe that you can have the success that you desire. Allow yourself to have the courage to pursue the avenues that will lead you to your financial success. Allow yourself to magnetize the people and scenarios that will help your team assemble effortlessly. Allow your spirit to dance with the knowledge that your have the power to bring what you want to fruition.

You do have what it takes to become a money magnet. You just have to believe in yourself, believe in your goals, and trust that the Universe will do its part once you've done yours.

Eva Gregory, master coach, speaker and author of The Feel Good Guide To Prosperity has instructed thousands on the Laws of Attraction in person, on the radio and in dozens of teleconference training seminars and programs. She is the author of several books and e-books and has co-developed several telephone-based and internet-based training courses on the Laws of Attraction. Her most popular program to date is her Leading Edge Living One Year Success Program. Eva is regularly featured on radio and in the media and is a recognized authority on the Laws of Attraction. To learn more about her products and services, visit Leading Edge Coaching.

NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the “about the author” info at the end), and you send a copy of your reprint to eva@coacheva.com.

Follow The Leader

We've been told for years that the best way to learn something is by example. That is why we are taught by teachers, use computer tutorials, and follow examples and exhibits in books. But what about in day to day life? Are there people that you can follow that intuitively know exactly what your needs and wishes are, so that you can copy their actions and/or solicit their advice? If I had to guess, I'd say not. So how does one go about finding someone to learn from? Go look in the mirror. You can achieve the things that you desire most in life, by following your own lead. There is a three step process: Be-ing, Do-ing, and Hav-ing.

How does one Be? Personally I think this is the most fun part, because all you need is an active imagination and the strongest desire to achieve your goal. This is when you focus your thoughts on your desired outcome, what your life will be like once you have it, who your friends are, where you are living, the job you may or may not have, the vacations you are taking, etc. This is when you get to live your desires, to plot them, to visualize them, to breathe life into them. The entire time that you are exploring the "be-ing" part, make sure you use all five of your senses :sight, sounds, taste, feel and smell. The use of your senses will make your goal that much more real. It will also provide you with powerful triggers when you encounter that smell or taste during the course of an ordinary day. Begin living your life as if you already are what you want to be.

The next step is Doing. Does this mean that you will actually have to come up with a plan for how to reach your goal? Not at all, have faith... it will come to you naturally. Once you experience the be-ing stage, you will undoubtedly realize that you feel compelled to pursue a course of action, make a call, greet a person, etc. Typically things that you normally would not do, would hesitate to consider, or would outwardly scoff at are what you will be inspired to pursue. These are called inspired actions, as they resulted from you being in tune with your goals. The doing state will propel you even closer to your desired outcome. Let the action happen, don't stand in its way.

The last step is Having. All too often people ask for things and when they are on the track to receiving them, perhaps just steps away from the finish line things go awry. Why does this occur? Because they allowed themselves to make it through the first two steps, but stopped just short of attaining their goals. Silly, you say? Yes, but quite easy to do and very understandable. It is in this stage where those negative self-talk voices can interfere wildly. "Oh, come on, you're never really gonna get _______" or "Oh, Puhleez, you can't _______" Does either of these statements or similar ones sound familiar? If so, perhaps you can recall a situation where you were THIS (holding fingers a millimeter apart) close and your (blank) fell through. Well, silence those voices. Stop them NOW, don't wait.

Sit down in a relaxing atmosphere and think about the things you want. Practice BE-ing in the lifestyle that you want in your mind, write it down if it will help you bring it to life. Allow yourself to fully experience the joy that comes from achieving your dreams. Once you get a taste of this, and nurture it, it will be easier for you to see your goals, and harder for you to convince yourself that you are not worthy. When you engage all of your senses you will be better able to recognize the nudges that will help you DO what you need to succeed. You are entitled to have your goals come to fruition. Allow yourself to reach the top of your mountain ... to HAVE. Get out of your own way. It's time ... follow your lead.

Eva Gregory, master coach, speaker and author of The Feel Good Guide To Prosperity has instructed thousands on the Laws of Attraction in person, on the radio and in dozens of teleconference training seminars and programs. She is the author of several books and e-books and has co-developed several telephone-based and internet-based training courses on the Laws of Attraction. Her most popular program to date is her Leading Edge Living One Year Success Program. Eva is regularly featured on radio and in the media and is a recognized authority on the Laws of Attraction. To learn more about her products and services, visit Leading Edge Coaching.

NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the “about the author” info at the end), and you send a copy of your reprint to eva@coacheva.com.

What Is The Secret?

What Is The Secret?

In Your Shoes

Ever wish that you could have the lifestyle of someone you truly admire? Perhaps it’s the lifestyle of the “rich and famous” like a movie star, or a singer? How do you think people would react if one day you decided to start acting like a “diva extraordinaire,” or a megastar actor? My guess is that your family might want to have you admitted for observation. Would the ramification be any less serious if you instead decided to imitate your next door neighbor or business mentor? Perhaps, your family and friends would not rush you to a facility, but I’ll bet they’ll still be quite puzzled. Unfortunately this type of behavior occurs all the time. Someone realizes that they don’t have what they want, so they look at the people who do and decide to copy their actions expecting to achieve the desired result. Alas, they frequently find themselves disappointed.

Graciella has “the life.” She just got the promotion that Tina secretly coveted, along with the huge office, has a wonderful house in the suburbs, the newest sport utility vehicle for bad weather and a flashy convertible for fun, a successful husband who loves to cook, and two darling children. When Tina compared her life to Graciella’s with the second mortgage, the one car that may or may not get her to work, and the cubicle the size of a shoebox, she couldn’t help but feel a tad short-changed. She didn’t begrudge Graciella the things she had achieved, but desperately wanted them for herself. So, Tina decided that if she wanted a similar lifestyle, she needed to behave in a very similar manner.

Tina became a “mini-Graciella.” She began to dress like Graciella, mimic her actions, and even eat similar things. At first Graciella was mildly amused, but quickly became annoyed and a tad concerned over Tina’s behavior. Tina’s metamorphosis did not go unnoticed by her other co-workers, and she suddenly found herself getting the attention she desired, but for all the wrong reasons. Her boss quickly became dissatisfied with her work because he relied upon the unique insight that Tina had brought to the table. After about a month of this troubling behavior he called her into his office. She anticipated the meeting with excitement. She just knew that he was going to offer her the remaining promotion. Why wouldn’t he? After all she had been doing exactly the same things as Graciella. Tina could not understand why her boss was not smiling when she walked in, as they had always had an easy relationship. After Tina sat he explained to her that she had been a shoe-in for the promotion until about a month before. He went on to say that instead of promoting her as he had hoped, he was actually issuing an informal warning because her performance had been seriously sub-standard. He told her that she had lost the promotion to another employee, but that she would have another chance in about a year, providing that her current issue was rectified immediately. Before she left he patted her hand and told her that one Graciella in the office was enough, but they really needed the input, intelligence, and insight that Tina brought to the team. As Tina walked back to her tiny cubicle fighting tears, she realized how creepy she had been behaving. She had willingly abandoned who she was, her unique traits, her quirky sense of humor, and her unerringly sense of intuition for her job. At what cost? She almost lost a job she truly enjoyed, was ostracized from people that she had worked with for years, and had move herself even further from her goals.

There are a number of ways that Tina could have handled the situation, but the most effective way would have been by embracing her uniqueness. Tina lost track of what was working for her and focused on what she wanted that she didn’t have. Tina forgot to embrace the qualities that made her Tina, to put those positive vibrations out into the universe so that those wonderful qualities of hers would attract more of the lifestyle that she desired. Tina got too caught up in “falling in line” and forgot that marching to her own tune could be just as much fun, and bring success on its own. Success tailored to Tina, the type that is the perfect fit for her because she attracted it to suit her qualities, desires, abilities, and spirit.

Remember to be your own unique self, be it similar to someone else or completely different, just be true to you. That authenticity and honesty is the heart of you, the heart from which your vibrations are unleashed. Honest thoughts, vibrations, and actions will produce amazing results that are so in-line with what you truly desire.

Eva Gregory, master coach, speaker and author of The Feel Good Guide To Prosperity has instructed thousands on the Laws of Attraction in person, on the radio and in dozens of teleconference training seminars and programs. She is the author of several books and e-books and has co-developed several telephone-based and internet-based training courses on the Laws of Attraction. Her most popular program to date is her Leading Edge Living One Year Success Program. Eva is regularly featured on radio and in the media and is a recognized authority on the Laws of Attraction. To learn more about her products and services, visit Leading Edge Coaching.

NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the “about the author” info at the end), and you send a copy of your reprint to eva@coacheva.com.

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