Monday, February 05, 2007

Serenity NOW!? It is Possible

You’re heading toward the cash register and glance at your side only to notice your child is not there. Retracing your steps you realize he’s about three paces behind you ogling a new video game. You watch the scenario play out in your head before you even open your mouth to say the game is not in your budget for today. When you tell him to follow, he immediately drops to the floor and lets the tantrum begin!

Children are a blessing and a joy, but there are days when they know exactly which button to push! It’s typically on a day when time is short, things are in chaos, tempers are flaring, the head is pounding and that light at the end of the tunnel is barely recognizable (meaning there are still several hours till bedtime.) How does one find their way back to a peaceful existence when there’s soft music and a date with Calgon™ waiting in your mind’s eye? The Universe has you covered, as always. You just have to focus and remember the basics:

First, even though your child just pulled the mother of all tantrums, it’s still in the past. How you handle the tantrum is the only present. The past and the future do not matter.

Second, take notice of how you feel. Are you angry, embarrassed, or heartbroken? Those feelings are all negative and focusing on them or reacting to them will only bring more of the same feelings. So nip them in the bud.

Third, remember that even though it’s their behavior that was a no-no, it’s your behavior that will escalate or diffuse the situation. Think of the parent who made a point in the store of pulling a full-fledged, down on the floor, screaming tantrum of her own. The parent was overjoyed at her own ingenuity, but the child was so embarrassed, the incident was never repeated – by either!

Fourth, sometimes you have to dig a little deeper to get back to that loveable place. You know, like thinking of how angelic they look when, they’re…er, sleeping, or remembering a super kind, completely selfless act – no matter when it occurred.

Fifth, remember that forgiveness is necessary in order to get you back to being who you are. The anger, resentment, and animosity moves you further from your place of alignment which only enhances the negative emotions and keeps that headache pounding. Think of how lousy you feel, physically, when you’re upset. Is it worth it? (Besides, it’s almost worth it to make them wonder what you’re smiling about, especially when they know they’re guilty as sin!)

Sixth, practice this as often as necessary so that it becomes second nature. The trick is to practice it during ideal situations, so that you’re accustomed to the way it feels to maintain your vibrational harmony when you’re stressed to the limit.

This is not a free-pass by any stretch. It is simply a way to regain or maintain your composure and re-direct a situation that has the potential to spiral out of control. So, what did this mom do? She counted to five (ten was too long with the decibel levels such as they were), and then started talking to him in a normal tone – he had to struggle to hear her through his yelling. She calmly told him that the rest of the items she intended to purchase were being left at the register if he did not immediately quiet down, get up and come along. Did it work? Yep! He looked her in the eyes and knew she meant it. She was not embarrassed – his actions were his actions, she was consistent with her approach – tantrums were not acceptable, but did not buy into the drama of it all. In the end she diffused the situation, did not buy into blackmail by embarrassment, and taught him that she loved him and would remain consistent despite the circumstance.

Eva Gregory, master coach, speaker and author of The Feel Good Guide To Prosperity has instructed thousands on the Laws of Attraction in person, on the radio and in dozens of teleconference training seminars and programs. She is the author of several books and e-books and has co-developed several telephone-based and internet-based training courses on the Laws of Attraction. Her most popular program to date is her Leading Edge Living One Year Success Program. Eva is regularly featured on radio and in the media and is a recognized authority on the Laws of Attraction. To learn more about her products and services, visit Leading Edge Coaching.


NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the “about the author” info at the end), and you send a copy of your reprint to eva@coacheva.com.

Love Yourself and the Love of Your Life Will Follow

You know how people say that love finds you when you’re least expecting it? Well isn’t this often true when applied to different life situations? The job of your dreams lands in your lap when you already have one. The ideal situation occurs when you’re focused on something else. Ever wonder why this happens? It occurs because you’re feeing okay with your world, which is the prime opportunity for more good things to follow.

Wendy wanted so much to find a guy to settle down with. All of her sisters were married. Her closest friends were either engaged or married, and there she was – alone and always the third, fifth or seventh wheel. Life was not fair! She hated going places on her own, hated coming home to an empty house, and desperately wanted to begin living the life she envisioned as a little girl. Does Wendy sound secure in her world, or is she focused on lack? It wasn’t as though she didn’t find guys to date, or even ones she thought she could build a life with, but none of them lasted too long. They were either too demanding, too lazy, did not want children, wanted too many children, or were simply dull and boring. What was Wendy to do? After ringing in another New Year alone, Wendy decided to go take a couple of classes at the Community Center. She signed up for a pottery class, a cooking class, and a walking tour of her neighborhood. Her friends teased her about her choice of classes, noting that she’d never find a man in those classes, but Wendy told them she was switching her focus from men to her, and could care less.

Wendy was on the right track. Instead of focusing on what she didn’t have and she decided to change her focus, but instead of being too quick to move into action and force a situation (trying to find the right guy, or putting herself in a place full of men), she decided to not act on her goal at all. Wendy instead started her journey to alignment. Wendy was not happy with herself and continually doubted her choices, talked herself down, and found her life lacking when compared to others. Wendy decided on this course when she opened a fortune cookie and her fortune read “Change yourself, change your world.” The cookie struck her in a way nothing else had. She was determined to find out if the cookie was true. To that end she stopped spending so much time with other couples, met some single people to hang out with, and learned to enjoy her own company. Once she completed her cooking class she spent evenings at home alone trying new recipes, rented movies, and when out with others she even stopped noticing how many couples were around.

Another New Year has come and Wendy still has not found the man of her dreams, but she is perfectly content now being solo. She knows that she will no longer settle for definitely-not Mr. Right or not-quite-Mr. Right. In fact, with her newfound sense of self-worth, she is no longer being approached by “losers” and has even turned down a couple of prospects. Wendy was living her life as though it was incomplete, but managed to pull it together. She realized that she was not satisfied and could not attract and maintain a healthy relationship, because she was not satisfied with herself before the opportunity for romance manifested itself.

No matter the situation, it’s never too late to attract or change the direction of a love relationship. The key is that one cannot change another, but can change themselves in order to attract what they’ve been wanting all along.

Eva Gregory, master coach, speaker and author of The Feel Good Guide To Prosperity has instructed thousands on the Laws of Attraction in person, on the radio and in dozens of teleconference training seminars and programs. She is the author of several books and e-books and has co-developed several telephone-based and internet-based training courses on the Laws of Attraction. Her most popular program to date is her Leading Edge Living One Year Success Program. Eva is regularly featured on radio and in the media and is a recognized authority on the Laws of Attraction. To learn more about her products and services, visit Leading Edge Coaching.

NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the “about the author” info at the end), and you send a copy of your reprint to eva@coacheva.com.